Sunday, September 23, 2007
BM minus 5 days and counting...
I love launches of spacecraft. Especially the NASA guy saying "T minus 1 minute and counting." The "T" I come to find out stands for takeoff. So that is the way I always think of countdowns.
This week, we shall have our own launch. We are launching our first Bar Mitzvah. Now, on the scale of Bar Mitzvahs, we are going quite small. A Shabbat dinner at a restaurant we like near our shul. A luncheon which is going to be catered, but is not obnoxious. In fact, we are specifically avoiding one of the BM traditions I HATE, spelling out my son's name in cream cheese. The party that night is at our neighborhood clubhouse. It's a casino night which is being put on by professional I've used at my shul, and he's giving me a great rate. That evening's food is being catered by a BBQ place here in Marietta.
All this should tell you, we are NOT trying to keep up with the Stein's.
Still, a BM is a new experience to us. We have had many, many parties, but this is a full weekend of events, with people coming in from out of town staying at two different places. Think of this as a project where there is one destination but many different ways you have to get there.
So, my head is filled with what has to be done. And as I work through the list and check things off, I suddenly remember other stuff that has to be done.
What really sucks is I'm getting older, so my memory is fleeting. So let's all help me keep my list of stuff to do.
Today - Clean all the carpets in my house. Check!!! And my back is in deep pain to prove it.
Monday - Meet with the Facilities manager at our temple. Make sure we can get in to deliver our stuff (centerpieces which Tracey made and which look fantastic), food, etc. Meet with our Cantor a few hours later to go over all of the service, make sure the clergy knows how to pronounce everyones name
Tuesday - I don't know, but I'm sure something will come up.
Wednesday - Make sure the out-of-town baskets are at the hotel, except for the one which goes to my Uncle and Aunt who are staying at a RV campground. Note to self: Take Tracey over to campground in continued futile attempt to show her how great living in an RV could be. Deliver all the non-food items which will be used at the synagogue to the synagogue (have to do this two days before because the next two days the temple is closed for Sukkot---dammit).
Thursday - Start the panic attack first thing in the AM. Get boys off to school then start worrying if the first of the travelers will make it in without a hitch (laughable, I know). Go to RV park when Uncle and Aunt come in to deliver their basket and marvel at the joys of RV living (when retired).
Friday - Completely lose it. Make sure everyone is getting from airport to hotel or other places. Get keys for clubhouse. Take stuff to clubhouse which can be refrigerated or otherwise stored so I have less to do on Saturday. Get stuff to shul for oneg (think of it as punch and cookies after we pray to G_d for punch and cookies). Go to dinner. Pay for dinner (nothing like dinner for 40). Go to services, start explaining stuff to all my non-jewish relatives. Go home and collapse, but not be able to sleep because of.....
Saturday - Get up at 6am. Shower. Sweat. Dry-heave. Wake up boys and have them shower and dress for synagogue. Get there at 9am so that we can be assured of as much tension as possible, and pray everyone remembers to show up who's supposed to show up (videographer, DJ, caterer, clergy, etc.). Watch my son become a man in the eyes of the Jewish people. Try to keep composed while giving him my blessing. Eat huge sums of bagels, cream cheese, tuna fish, etc. Leave synagogue at around 3pm or so, run to the BBQ place, get food for the night's festivities, run home, change clothes (because I HATE to wear a suit and tie), then run over to the clubhouse to get it ready for the evenings fun. Try to have fun during the evening. Go home, collapse, and sleep because there is no further real responsibility on my part.
Sunday - Get up much, much later. Get dressed, off to the brunch for my son put on by my wife's sister (who knows how to put on a nosh), and eat myself silly while secretly hoping she's made chopped liver (which I detest) so I can see my relatives reaction to it. Go home, enjoy a few hours with my father, take him and my stepmother to the airport, go home, collapse one final time.
Monday - Take day off to recover from BM.
Soon to be BM minus 4 days and counting. OY!
This week, we shall have our own launch. We are launching our first Bar Mitzvah. Now, on the scale of Bar Mitzvahs, we are going quite small. A Shabbat dinner at a restaurant we like near our shul. A luncheon which is going to be catered, but is not obnoxious. In fact, we are specifically avoiding one of the BM traditions I HATE, spelling out my son's name in cream cheese. The party that night is at our neighborhood clubhouse. It's a casino night which is being put on by professional I've used at my shul, and he's giving me a great rate. That evening's food is being catered by a BBQ place here in Marietta.
All this should tell you, we are NOT trying to keep up with the Stein's.
Still, a BM is a new experience to us. We have had many, many parties, but this is a full weekend of events, with people coming in from out of town staying at two different places. Think of this as a project where there is one destination but many different ways you have to get there.
So, my head is filled with what has to be done. And as I work through the list and check things off, I suddenly remember other stuff that has to be done.
What really sucks is I'm getting older, so my memory is fleeting. So let's all help me keep my list of stuff to do.
Today - Clean all the carpets in my house. Check!!! And my back is in deep pain to prove it.
Monday - Meet with the Facilities manager at our temple. Make sure we can get in to deliver our stuff (centerpieces which Tracey made and which look fantastic), food, etc. Meet with our Cantor a few hours later to go over all of the service, make sure the clergy knows how to pronounce everyones name
Tuesday - I don't know, but I'm sure something will come up.
Wednesday - Make sure the out-of-town baskets are at the hotel, except for the one which goes to my Uncle and Aunt who are staying at a RV campground. Note to self: Take Tracey over to campground in continued futile attempt to show her how great living in an RV could be. Deliver all the non-food items which will be used at the synagogue to the synagogue (have to do this two days before because the next two days the temple is closed for Sukkot---dammit).
Thursday - Start the panic attack first thing in the AM. Get boys off to school then start worrying if the first of the travelers will make it in without a hitch (laughable, I know). Go to RV park when Uncle and Aunt come in to deliver their basket and marvel at the joys of RV living (when retired).
Friday - Completely lose it. Make sure everyone is getting from airport to hotel or other places. Get keys for clubhouse. Take stuff to clubhouse which can be refrigerated or otherwise stored so I have less to do on Saturday. Get stuff to shul for oneg (think of it as punch and cookies after we pray to G_d for punch and cookies). Go to dinner. Pay for dinner (nothing like dinner for 40). Go to services, start explaining stuff to all my non-jewish relatives. Go home and collapse, but not be able to sleep because of.....
Saturday - Get up at 6am. Shower. Sweat. Dry-heave. Wake up boys and have them shower and dress for synagogue. Get there at 9am so that we can be assured of as much tension as possible, and pray everyone remembers to show up who's supposed to show up (videographer, DJ, caterer, clergy, etc.). Watch my son become a man in the eyes of the Jewish people. Try to keep composed while giving him my blessing. Eat huge sums of bagels, cream cheese, tuna fish, etc. Leave synagogue at around 3pm or so, run to the BBQ place, get food for the night's festivities, run home, change clothes (because I HATE to wear a suit and tie), then run over to the clubhouse to get it ready for the evenings fun. Try to have fun during the evening. Go home, collapse, and sleep because there is no further real responsibility on my part.
Sunday - Get up much, much later. Get dressed, off to the brunch for my son put on by my wife's sister (who knows how to put on a nosh), and eat myself silly while secretly hoping she's made chopped liver (which I detest) so I can see my relatives reaction to it. Go home, enjoy a few hours with my father, take him and my stepmother to the airport, go home, collapse one final time.
Monday - Take day off to recover from BM.
Soon to be BM minus 4 days and counting. OY!
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Happy Jewish New Year
It's Erev Rosh Hashannah.
This means two distinct things.
1) G_d inscribed me in the book of life for the year 5767. I lived throughout the year and actually had a pretty good year, all things considered.
2) G_d must now decide if I am to be inscribed in the book of life for the year 5768. I really hope he/she does.
Since it is late, I shall quickly say what was amazing about 5767.
My eldest son became a teenager yesterday. He's 13. How the hell did that happen?!?!?!
My youngest son continues to be too damn cute and smart. It's scary how much smarter he is than I was at that age.
My wife continues to love me. Reminds me of the line, "The kindness of women amazes me!"
I am doing well professionally. No matter how much stress I feel, I still find a way to handle it. That certainly wasn't always the case.
Day by day, we are getting closer to the moment that W is no longer our dummy in chief.
So, eat an apple and have some honey. May we all have a sweet new year (no matter that it is September).
This means two distinct things.
1) G_d inscribed me in the book of life for the year 5767. I lived throughout the year and actually had a pretty good year, all things considered.
2) G_d must now decide if I am to be inscribed in the book of life for the year 5768. I really hope he/she does.
Since it is late, I shall quickly say what was amazing about 5767.
My eldest son became a teenager yesterday. He's 13. How the hell did that happen?!?!?!
My youngest son continues to be too damn cute and smart. It's scary how much smarter he is than I was at that age.
My wife continues to love me. Reminds me of the line, "The kindness of women amazes me!"
I am doing well professionally. No matter how much stress I feel, I still find a way to handle it. That certainly wasn't always the case.
Day by day, we are getting closer to the moment that W is no longer our dummy in chief.
So, eat an apple and have some honey. May we all have a sweet new year (no matter that it is September).
